Well, today was a great day with JL, Ed and Zelly. Was a great, great, wonderful evening. Risk was so much fun despite the fact that the game rules were all made up by JL. What the hell. :O Board game club is an amazing CCA despite the dorky name man. And I can't believe I actually spent the entire evening with the trio! It was from like 5 or 6 until a good 12:45 in the morning.
Still couldn't believe how beautiful you are and I can only bring that pretty face to UK with me as memories and photographs. And I just can't believe how much you've sacrificed for Axxie. Like gosh. I would've loved you to molecular size if I had you. If.
I haven't slept in a week and I'm kinda used to not sleeping at all now. And I actually spent one of the night to write you this. I intended to say them to you face to face, but I guess I'll never have to chance to.
Know, I'll be leaving soon and you are the one that I would miss the most terribly. It's that cute face of your's when you laugh and smile that would be lodged so deeply in my mind (aka, the pig face!)>
I've lost you once and I'm going to lose you again and probably for good this time. With that, I have so much regrets. I'll cry for that because I'll probably be up all night thinking about you. and I too, wish that I could stay just a little longer. Who would actually be there, physically and mentally, for you when you're at your worst? Okay sure, you have many other friends that are probably better than I am but you know, it just sucks to know that I play no part in your life anymore. At least I've got your bookmark in a box because it holds such dear memories. I'd be frequently using it though because I wish that you were with me every page that I flip and read. (I've told you this part before) I tend to throw away lighters but the one you gave me, I never did. I keep it with me every where I go and even when it no longer lights up, I'll still be having it in my pocket. Always.
I'm going to harvest every ounce of memory I have with you because I'll definitely need them to pull me through. If I could clasp your in mind, I would love that you'd remember the warmth that envelopes your delicate, supple hands. Should you feel cold and alone or whatsoever, I want you to remember the feeling that it gave you.
You have Axel with you should you need a shelter but from what I know, he could actually bring you some. But I'm pretty sure it'll always tide over. Be firm, be less sensitive because he definitely loves you more than I'll ever do. Should you ever need someone to puke your sorrow or what have you, I'm always an MSN chat away, a skype call or oovoo call away and definitely a phone call away. No matter how much it'll cost me, I will call you. No matter what. I swear. I actually wish I could take you with me.
I know you found some of my gestures obnoxious and repulsive, but it's just my last something that I want to do to have myself remembered by you, my dearest best friend.
I wish you good luck in everything you do and may little Cupid smile upon you and Axel. And don't bloody forget to send me an eVite or invite or what have you to your wedding!
xoxo,
Alfie.
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